June 29, 2012

What is Recovery?

"Inspiration for Recovery can come in an instant....no need to search for it. It will arrive inside--a moment of knowing--to awaken your senses to your true Self." ~Barbara Sinor, Ph.D.

My son, Richard, used to say, "Recovery is nothing but a moment in time when I feel normal." In his life, Richard was 'in recovery' many times. He would call himself a "recovering alcoholic" at these times. At those times, I assumed him had recovered his true Self again.

This question is a good meditation:  What do you recover, or uncover, when you choose to stay sober and straight for a period of time?

Tales of Addiction

June 20, 2012

New Beginnings

Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has plenty;
not on your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.
~Charles Dickens

Who has experienced a traumatic event in their life? Who has experienced the loss of a loved-one? Who is experiencing the beginning of a new relationship? Or, a new job? We all know that New Beginnings can happen in a instant. By giving ourselves permission to begin a new day, a new path, a new way of thinking--we can choose to begin again. We experience New Beginnings many times in our lives. Take a moment to look at your own life, your past experiences. Think about the new ways in which you have needed to begin again many times throughout your life.

New Beginnings can happen when you:
--Began a new job or career
--A new diet or exercise program
--A new relationship
--A new kind of worship or meditation practice
--A new school or educational training
--Welcome a new pet into your family
--A new baby is born
--The death of a loved one is experienced
--Are challenged with a new health issue, or
--You have recently been married, separated, or divorced

Each time we journey on a new path to experience a New Beginning, it is important to consciously allow ourselves to review, process our emotions--especially forgiveness--and learn to accept our new path. Before we move toward a New Beginning, it is also important to learn the Lessons from our past experience. One way to do this is to ask ourselves questions such as:

What do I know now that I did not know before this experience?
Why was it important for me to learn this truth or lesson?
Do I need to forgive others or myself before I move forward?
How have my emotions changed since this event?

This brief paragraph from the journal “A Women’s Journey” sheds a Light on this inner process:
The hardest part about “moving on” from the past is that the only place left to go is the present. And the problem with living in the present time is that everything in it was created in the past! Facing the reality of what you have co-created can be terrifying--until you understand that the past is not something to discard, deny, or leave behind. The past is a deep source of experience and knowledge from which you can learn and grow. Your desire to know who you are, what you want, and what you are capable of is unearthing details from the past that are making you realize that you no longer fit the image you are outwardly portraying. Unless your mind more fully accepts your greater potential, how can you effectively plan your way ahead?
After an emotional experience such any one of those I mentioned above, there will be a time for you to bring your life forward, and to be visible on your present stage of life. Choose options that uplift and inspire you, and whenever possible, engage in positive thinking. It may also be time for a health makeover, a change in environment, or a renewal to your outlook on life. Remember, New Beginnings require us to plant new seeds for our future, so make sure those seeds contain all the ingredients to reflect what you desire for your present and future life.

Lessons in Moving Forward
Numerologist Christine DeLorey states: “Stop holding your past at arms length as if you are afraid that it will catch up with you. It's meant to! Let it! The past is filled with knowledge and experience, and what it has to teach you needs to be accepted into the present. Only then will you be able to feel, sense, and create what you want.” When renewal and New Beginnings are at hand, we need to clarify what has worked for us and what has not, so we can choose only what takes us forward on our journey. As we allow winter to unfold and spring to shine upon us, we can identify the dead wood which can be removed from our life.

We all have the ability to make minor, or even major breakthroughs, any time we choose, now may be the right time for you. Use your freedom of choice to draw your new life to you. In their book Ask and It is Given, Esther and Jerry Hicks write of our ability to use our freedom of choice and direct our thoughts to manifest our reality:
You have the ability to direct your own thoughts; you have the option of observing things as they are, or of imagining them as you want them to be -- and whichever option you choose, whether you are imagining or observing, is equally powerful. You have the option of remembering something as it actually occurred or imagining it as you would prefer. You have the option of remembering something that pleased you or remembering something that did not please you…. In every case, your thoughts produce a vibration within you that equals your point of attraction and then circumstances and events line up to match the vibration that you have offered…. But when a vibration within you is one you have practiced a great deal, the tendency is to continue to offer the vibration in the way you have been practicing it--no matter how much you wish it to be different.
Here is a great affirmation you can use to claim this freedom of choice: “Today, I make the choice to end a cycle or way of being that is not in alignment with my soul’s desire.”

One of the hardest things in life is feeling stuck in a situation that we don’t like and we wish to change. We may have exhausted ourselves trying to figure out how to make changes, and we may have even given up on a certain area in our life. However, each new day offers us the opportunity to renew our resolve and to declare to the Universe that we are ready for change. Sometimes, we may say to ourselves that we have tried, we have struggled, and we still have not found a way to begin again after experiencing a shift in our life. If this is true for you, allow yourself to be open to support and guidance from the physical loved ones around you, and also the non-physical masters, teachers, guides, and angels that are always with you. State your intention out loud in prayer or meditation--keep it positive and simple, such as: ”I am creating the changes I need at this time.” Making this declaration to the Divine Universe, and to yourself, may be the remedy for any stagnation you may be experiencing.

Many times, it is difficult to understand, even with hindsight, how the choices we have made in the past have created our current situations. It is a good idea to examine the “story” we tell ourselves about how we arrived in our present situation. If we tend to regard ourselves as having failed at a task or situation, this will block our ability to allow ourselves to succeed. We have the power to change the story we tell ourselves by acknowledging that we have done our best.

With insight, information, and support, we can acknowledge that we have made our best decisions for our life in the past. We can remember the many positive moments on our path to this present moment. We can also recognize that we have learned from our experiences, this will help us determine what our current choices might be, and how to go about making them. When we do this kind of inner work of viewing our past, we make it possible for the future to be based on a positive self-assessment. This inner-shift may allow us to exit the cycle we have been on which keeps us stuck in past behaviors or emotions.

Today, you can declare to be the day you will end negative habits, cycles, or patterns. You can declare this day that you will move forward from past emotional pain, anger, and guilt. Today, you can enter into a new way of being. Today, you can declare this day to begin searching for the Lessons of past experiences--learn from them, and move into the present!

A Personal Note
Many of you know that my son passed away a few years ago and my husband also made his transition last year. I have used these tools which I share with you to uncover my own New Beginning. It has taken me about a year to realize how important they really have been. Right after my son’s passing, I unconsciously kept myself very busy. I was not ready for a New Beginning without him. Not only did I need to take care of all his arrangements, paperwork, finances, and consoling our family--I chose to continue the busy-work of writing a book I had started several months earlier. In hindsight, I realize how keeping myself occupied with writing, and getting the book published, kept me from the important steps of reviewing, accepting, and working with forgiveness that I needed to in order to move forward with my life. When one year had passed and the book was released, I took the time to do this inner work.

When I was ready, I asked myself the important questions about my emotional loss. I asked myself what lessons did I learn from both my son, and from his leaving this physical earth before me. I learned there is no right way to love an alcoholic…only that you must. I learned compassion is sometimes elusive, but always within reach and is a potent healing agent. I recognized the changes I needed to undergo within myself, my relationship with my husband, and my career.

Realizing how important this inner work had been for me after my son died, I knew I must follow through with this same emotional clearing after my husband passed away. I am still doing this process. I know I am beginning a new phase of my life. I am learning how to breathe deep again. I am doing the inner work of asking myself questions to help unfold my deepest feelings. I am searching my past, receiving answers, and starting a new life journey.

Something to Do Each Day
Remember the famous quote by the philosopher Kierkegaard? It went something like this? “Life can only be understood backwards, however, it must be lived forward.” My interpretation of this quote is: “We can learn a great deal from our past experiences, but we must live our lives today to co-create our tomorrows.”

To help you move forward onto your soul’s New Beginning Journey, here is a meditation/visualization you can enlist each morning before getting out of bed. To experience this meditation now, read below then put your feet flat on the floor and close your eyes as if you are just waking up:

Take a few deep breaths and relax your body and mind. Imagine you are just waking up from a long night’s sleep. Just before you open your eyes in the morning, feel the excitement of greeting a new day. Allow a sense of joy to enter every cell of your body. Allow the Divine White Light to enter the top of your head and slowly travel down into your chest, arms, torso, hips, legs, and out your feet. Now, as you are laying there, place your hand on your heart…
Your heart speaks for your soul with every beat. Listen as this whispering beat repeats: be...gin, be...gin, be...gin, be…gin.

Then open your eyes and accept these gifts of Love, Light, and Life… and Begin a New Day!

Love & Light,
*This article was published in the "Recovering the Self" Journal April 2012

June 18, 2012

Hello Everyone!
After a long respite from the events of last year, I am returning to share my thoughts, journaling, dreams, ideas, and adventures with you once again.

Since my life has been all about "change" these past several months, I found these words to post. I hope they can offer you the comfort they have me.

Change can enter our lives silently....
“We all see things about ourselves, our relationships, and our world that we want to change. Often, this desire leads us to take action toward inner work that we need to do or toward some external goal. Sometimes, without any big announcement or momentous shift, we wake up to find that change has happened, seemingly without us. This can feel like a miracle as we suddenly see that our self-esteem really does seem to be intact, or our partner actually is helping out around the house more. We may even wonder whether all of our hard work had anything to do with it, or if it just happened by way of grace.

We observe, consider, work, and wonder, tilling the soil of our lives, planting seeds, and tending them. Sometimes the hard part is knowing when to stop and let go, handing it over to the Universe. Usually this happens by way of distraction or disruption, our attention being called away to other more pressing concerns. And it is often at these times, when we are not looking, in the silence of nature’s embrace, that the miracle of change happens.” ~The Daily OM
this is a test of barbara sinor's blog
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